I realise it’s been a while since I’ve posted on here, and I will explain why, because I feel that it’s important for people to know.

As you know, I have suffered with anxiety my whole life, but only being recently formally diagnosed (in May 2017). I have battled with panic attacks throughout the course of my life and 2017 has defiantly been the worst, most testing, year yet.

Over the Christmas period, I have been having at least 3 or 4 panic attacks every day in the space of about two weeks. If you’ve ever endured a panic attack or anxiety episode, you will know that it is absolutely exhausting and draining. I haven’t felt like eating, and as a result I have lost nearly a stone in weight. I only weigh just over 6 stone anyway on a normal day so to lose this much weight is a concern. I have also been sleeping for most of the Christmas period, which makes me worry that I am ruining everyone else’s fun and ruining it for my family, which sparks off another anxiety attack. My anxiety also makes me feel sick to my stomach with nausea, like I’m going to throw up at any moment. I am sick of feeling sick. I’m fed up of not feeling like my normal self and being able to enjoy my favourite time of the year, as, once again, I have ruined it for myself and my family.

Yesterday, I decided to nip this feeling in the bud and try and get help before it spirals out of control. I phoned my local GP and was asked what the matter was by the receptionist. I told her that my usual doctor and I had discussed my anxiety and that it was beginning to get worse again. The receptionist then said ‘oh, so it isn’t an emergency then?’ And made me a phone appointment for three weeks time with a doctor I had ever met before. I was on the brink of tears so I accepted the appointment and hung up before sobbing and thinking that nobody in the world cared.

Desperate, I searched for any help online. The only thing I could find was a self-referral form for group sessions for people with anxiety. ‘Group sessions for people with anxiety’. Surely that’s a huge oxymoron in itself?

So basically, I am being out-right honest here. I am really struggling right now, and when people ask me ‘how are you coping’, just know that I am not coping. I don’t know how to deal with this and it’s scary. And now learning that there is absolutely zero help out there makes me feel even more alone. I just hope my own mind can sort itself out, because it seems nothing else will.

Sorry for the downer.



I’ve Been Nominated For The Liebster Award!


Thank you for nominating me for the Liebster Award. I have nominated 11 blogs for the same award, the rules are as follows…

1) Acknowledge the blog who nominated you for this award.

2) Answer 11 questions the blogger gave you.

3) Give 11 random facts about yourself.

4) Nominate 11 blogs.

5) Notify them.

6) Give them 11 questions to answer. 

So, here goes with my answers… 

1. What is a moment in your life that changed the rest of your life forever?
When I got accepted to university! I spent all of my school life being on ‘average’ grades (turns out B’s aren’t average and my friends were just brainiacs). But for once in my life I was proud of myself and believed I was actually maybe a tiny bit clever. 
2. Since your first blog post, have you learned anything? What was it? 

I’ve learnt how lovely the blogging community is! I’ve made so many friends, and I only have ninety-something followers!

3. If you could give any piece of advice right now, what would you say?

Don’t live your life for other people. Do what you want to and make yourself happy. Don’t worry about what other people are doing or what seems ‘right’. There is no right and wrong, there is only what works for you. 

4. What kind of mark would you like to leave in someone’s life?

I want people to say that I am a good friend and I’m fun to be around. 

5. Are there any regrets you feel right now? Could you mend them if you were able to?

I don’t think I have any regrets, but if I did I would certainly try to fix them. 

6. What was your favorite childhood movie or book growing up?

The first Harry Potter book came out when I was 6 and the films followed. They are my childhood. 

7. Do you like playing games? What is your favorite game?

Yaaaas!! I loooove games, especially bored games. I love this board game called Obama Llama, a rhyming/celebrity-based board game. Give it a go if you’ve never tried it! 😆

8. What is your favorite food to eat? 


9. What could you go without for a month? (Choose something that wouldn’t be easy)

I could honestly go without my phone for a month. I feel like it’s attached to my hand for pure convenience, but I grew up without that convenience. I could probably do it if I needed to, and sometimes a part of me wants to!

10. Who in your life has made a lasting impression?

My uni friends. There’s something to be said for friends who saw you through the toughest time of your life. 

11. If you could do one small thing to help another person today, what would it be?

Tell all the people that read my blog that I am always available to talk to. 

11 random facts about me:

  • I have hyper mobility in my thumbs so they bend back on themselves. It’s a great party trick. 
  • I have loads of friends over the age of 40 who have kids my age…
  • I am not naturally blonde (!)
  • I love my cat but I want a pug. 
  • I have been driving for four years!
  • The Killers are my fave. 
  • I used to love 1D and I’ve seen them live 5 times. 
  • I live in Devon on the edge of Dartmoor and I’m also near the sea which I love!
  • There’s nothing I love more than Christmas. 
  • I am a teaching assistant in a secondary school so I work with 11-18 year olds and I love it. 
  • I live in pyjamas. 

Thank you to https://nobledevotionblog.wordpress.com/ for nominating me for this award!

My nominated blogs:













Halloween/ Christmas Haul!



I think I may have peaked too soon, guys… I have basically nearly finished my Christmas shopping. And now I’ve started on decorations. The only thing I haven’t got is presents for my parents and a tree…

I feel like when it comes to December I’m going to be sick of the entire Christmas season, but for now, it’s great! Also, Halloween is UPON US. My friend and I took to Poundland, Hobby Craft and B&M to feed our excitement for the autumn and approaching winter, and here is the result:

Let’s start with Poundland. I can’t believe how much I got in here for £6! (6 things believe it or not…)

I mean… pumpkin lights. Can you even go wrong? They’re battery powered which kinda sucks, but they’ll only be one for one evening so hopefully should last. HOW CUTE???

These are my fave things I bought. They’re skeleton and a pumpkin tea light holders, A POUND EACH. They’re ceramic and everything and I just love them lots. 

The last Halloween thing I got from Poundland are the sweets for the trick or treaters. I love having themed sweets and not just your bog-standard drum sticks. These are eye-ball lollipop and Casper marshmallows- yaaaas!!

Okay, onto B&M and Christmas! If you don’t have a B&M near you, I can only sympathise. It’s a beautiful place. Especially for cheap little seasonal things that’ll spend most of the year in the loft. 

I am soooo happy with this purchase. I got 100 multicoloured Christmas lights for £5.99! And they’re plug-in ones which just makes me super happy. I just tried them out and believe me when I say they’re beautiful. 

And lastly, can you really go wrong with a box of candy canes for £1? I think not. 

Hope you enjoyed this post and that you’re just as excited about Christmas as I am!!

Happy holidays! (Too soon?)



Blogtember Day #30- Work Primark Haul!!



For the last day of September, I went shopping to get some more clothes for work (I barely have any)! Sorry if it’s not very exciting but some bits are lovely and autumn-y so stay tuned! 

Okay, so this first item is not for work (great start, Em) but I just had to get it. It’s a really cosy and soft jumper with Beauty and the Beast embroidered characters. £15, so not the cheapest thing Primark has ever sold, but cute and kinda worth it. 

Next is a very un-exciting black pencil skirt. It’s kind of a t-shirt material so it’s stretchy, which makes it a lot easier to move about in, hopefully! This one was £5 and goes with everything, right?

Staying with the bottom half, I picked up a pair of navy blue cropped smart/work trousers. They’re a lovely fit and look smart for work, so you can’t really go wrong. And thy have pockets- hurrah!!

I was, at first, disgusted with the very notion of roll-neck jumpers in Primark. I actually picked this one up by accident and threw it back down in disgrace. However, I thought about it for a bit and thought how lovely it would look with a scarf and a pair of loose fitting trousers, like the ones above, for work. So I went for it. I’ve yet to try it out in the work environment and get a teenager’s verdict, but I like it. 

I absolutely love this shirt, but again, I don’t know how it’ll work in practice just yet. It’s such a lovely baby pink shade with a breast pocket and pearls sewn onto the collar. Simple and so cute. And only £5!

Can you ever have too many scarfs for work in the winter? I literally live in them. This one is soooo cute. It’s a navy blue with gold stars all over it. I am in love with it. And it looks so expensive! £4. 

Okay, so these next two aren’t from Primark, but I thought I’d share them with you anyway. They’re the same style (I actually already have a beige one), one is yellow and one is bright orange. 

They’re from H&M and only £8.99, but they’re such a lovely fit. I wore one to work yesterday and got so many compliments! And the colours are so so so lovely for autumn! I’m kind of happy Halloween is on a work day, so I can wear the orange one then! 🙂 
Hope you enjoyed this post, and all of my posts throughout Blogtember! I’m sad to be seeing Blogtember coming to an end, but it’s just got me more excited about Blogmas!!! Obviously I’ll be posting before then, so stay tuned and in touch! Thank you for all your support, reads, likes and comments throughout the month- love you lots!



Blogtember Day #29- 7 Every Day Make Up Essentials. 



For day 29, I thought I’d share my list of seven make up items I can’t possibly live without and wear every day. 

  • Rimmel 25 Hour liquid foundation and Collection Lasting Perfection concealer. 

  • Collection pressed powder and Too Faced Glow face palette. 

  • Too Faced Sweet Peach eye shadow palette 

  • Collection colonising mascara and Collection pressed brow powder. 

The loves I cannot live without!



Blogtember Day #27- The Dentist!!



Sorry for this short blog post today. I have been to the dentist and am currently dying (slight exaggeration). Okay, so on Boxing Day, yes, that long ago, I managed to fracture my tooth on a potato wedge. And since then I’ve visited the dentist five times!! They haven’t managed to fix it and now I’m going through the process of having a crown fitted! Fingers crossed this’ll work and I’ll be able to eat nice crunchy things again on both sides of my mouth…. the dream!

Anyway, my mouth and face is currently numb and swollen and I look like a dribbling mess. The anaesthetic I’ve been given is so strong I just want to sleep…. so that’s what I’m going to do. 

Good night! 



P.s. Here’s a pic of me from yesterday when my face was of normal proportions. 

Blogtember Day #26- 10 Things That Make Me Happy!



I’m a big believer in reminding yourself of the good things in your life. So I’m going to share the ten things that make me super happy. I’d love to hear your’s too!
1) Early nights and cosy TV shows. 

I’m a very tired person. Generally. I am usually in bed by 9pm and falling asleep with the TV on after ten minutes. I love to put a familiar show on to fall asleep to. These currently include Outnumbered, Miranda, Gavin & Stacey and Horrible Histories! Ha!
2) My cat.

I love my little baby. She’s called Roxy and she’s 12 years old. We’ve had her since I was 12 so she’s a huge part of my life. I couldn’t be without her.
3) My job.

As much as I loooove to moan about work, I actually love my job. Working with children and young people means that life is never dull and every day is different. That’s for sure.
4) My wonderful friends. 

I take my friends for granted a lot and I’m awful at that. But lately I’ve been having some tough times and I’ve realised how much I bloody love my friends. Especially my bestie Katie and the wonderful Bethany (http://dreamsoflustre.wordpress.com/).
5) Make up.

It sounds super shallow, right? Thing is, I’m not actually a huuuuge make up wearer, but I enjoy experimenting and watching tutorials of how to get different looks. It’s just a bit of fun!
6) House plants. 

If your house plants don’t have names, do you even own house plants?
7) Books!!

I am one of those people who read their favourite book so many times that it’s falling apart. My taste in books so so diverse, you wouldn’t even believe me. My two faves are To Kill A Mockingbird and The Wind in the Willows. I also love teen fiction (Looking For Alaska is fave), and I’m also a member of the folio society for Samuel Pepyes’ diaries. See, told you you wouldn’t believe me. Also love a good non-fiction Brian Cox number, a screen play, or even a Shakespeare play. I mean, give me your car instruction manual and I’ll read it.
8) Christmas!!

So I always say that after my birthday, Christmas begins! And, as you know, my birthday was three days ago so Christmas is now in full swing.
9) Music. 

Music makes everything better, right? Again, diverse taste. Let’s just say from Joy Division to One Direction and leave it at that, shall we?
10) Bullet Journalling. 

As you may have seen from my previous bu-jo post, I’m a journaller and thrive in all things stationary and washi tape.

Hope you liked reading about the things that make me happy. I’d love to hear your’s- comment below 🙂